The pain that sleeps inside
Latly i've begun feeling a little more and more down in the dumps. I began thinkin to myself that there is a part of me that is beginning to miss her (former g/f) and I just cannot let her go. My mother doesnt understand this and believes I should have moved on already, but every time I see her, I cannot avoid her, I cannot shut her out of my mind, I am distracted by her and loose all sense of direction when I see her. Its a pain that sleeps inside (off a song from Hoobastank) and in all seriousness, I wont ever get over her, and it will always hurt me. Ive tried so hard to let her go, and I cant. Ive tried moving on, I even tried hooking up with another friend of mine, but that didnt work and it just gave me more pain, im almost in belief that im just not thinking this through and im getting hasty to try and fix something thats beyond repair. I miss her and its hurting me so bad. My classes begin in less than a week and I can already tell im gonna be stressed out, not just from the classes but from this as well. I mean, am I a person who really requires that companionship or am I just desperate for something I really dont need right now. I mean I have 2 years left of college, how can I truthfully support someone while im going to school and have a part-time job, just enough to cover the bills from the college and books and supplies.... What am I trying to do here? I dont even understand myself now, and Im just loosing my mind. Whats worse, theres another girl I have a thing for, but I cant even find the right moment to even tell her that I like her, again am I being to hasty or desperate?